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Do I have manners? Yes, sir/m’am! (Not-a-meme challenge #18) | VintFalken.com
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VintFalken.com

Do I have manners? Yes, sir/m’am! (Not-a-meme challenge #18)

June 25, 2007 12:16 pm

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There’s a new not a meme! Hear! Hear! Rose Farina asks us if in our Second Life’s we have manners. Not the ‘tell your Xcite not to talk to channel 0′ manners, but when you tell someone you will do something or be somewhere for something do you show up? Are you generally polite to other players you don’t know? Do you feel free to blast others because of the anonymity factor? Do you belong to the group who says if you can’t say anything nice don’t say anything at all group? Feel free to rant, vent or rave about your view on this subject.

My in-world manners

I think I am an overall friendly and polite avie, but of course, I can be mistaken. *grins* I try to help ‘teh n00bz’ asking me questions and once in a while I even slip them 200L$ so they can start uploading textures - although I think most of them spend it on tipping strippers anyway. If I say ‘RTFB’ or ‘Read the Fucking Blog’ I leave out the ‘fucking’ and add the permalink to the blogpost they can find the answer and a message that they should first read that one and then ask me when there are any questions left.

As for abusing the power of anonymity, I realise all to well I have none of that. When registering this blog’s URL with my real name, I kissed that - imho, overvalued possession - goodbye. Which means I threat people like I would do in First Life, except if ’stepping out of character’, like with the seriously ‘disclaimered’ SLelections. Do note that I do not shoot my First Life friends, and that there are some other minor differences, but those differences all originate from the different nature of the Second Life metaverse compared to the First Life one.

When IM’ed or e-mailed with a question, suggestion or just a simple ‘hello’, I try always to answer with (different versions) of one of the following replies:

  • Hi to you too + optional text. (On the simple ‘hello’.)
  • Yes, of course, …
  • Yes, but later… (mostly followed by ‘mail that to me, please)
  • No, sorry, I do not have the time/I do not think this to be in my field of interests/…
  • Maybe, can you send me some more information?
  • No, but maybe you could ask/talk to/… *insert avie name here*

If I do not reply, your IM must have slipped through or was not noticed before a crash. Feel free to remind me of replying to you. ;)

As I do try to reply - be it shortly or not - to all IM’s I receive, one of the most annoying things is people who do not do the same. If someone states in his or her profile that there is a better way to contact them, I’ll use that one, but if they do not, I expect them to reply to IM’s.

To work around the capped of delivery of messages, create an e-mail account and let Second Life deliver your off line received messages to that account by changing the settings here. You shall still not receive them in-world, but you shall get all IM’s in email and can reply to them by email or later when in-world and using search for the person who has send the IM.

Also in Second Life, the Golden Rule applies: ‘Do not do to others that which would anger you if others did it to you.’ (Socrates)

My VintFalken.com Blog

Again, I think of myself as having a ‘decent style’ on my Second Life blog too. What I consider basic (SL) blog etiquette:

  • Respect copyright: If you want to use copyrighted material - and we can assume that anything found on the net that isn’t clearly annotated as being in public domain or under CC license actually ‘belongs’ to someone and is thus copyrighted - ask the original creator of the material - be it text, pictures, … - if you may reproduce that content and how they wish you make clear that it is their content and not yours.
  • Respect CC and attribution: When using CC material, give a decent attribution with it. Clearly noting it was not your content and a link back to where the original content is and people can contact the original creator. Not obliged, but certainly polite is to let that person know that you liked what he is creating and that you are using his/her content.
  • On the CC non-commercial license: If you are running adsense, other ads or affliate links the page reproducing the content, clearly, you are not a non-commercial blog and you should ask before reproducing content licensed under CC non-commercial.
  • If someone tipped you on something, gave you a great idea or ran a story before you, do the polite thing and give them the deserved credit. You want them to do the same for you, no?
  • Share knowledge: Do not just say ’see what I have’, but also add ‘here you can find it too’. Do not just say ‘look what I can do’, also add ‘if you want to give it a try, this is how you start’. Believe me, people will appreciate this.
  • Do not ‘thrash’ something or someone without a reason. You can say you dislike a certain person or service, but do share why you dislike it. Contacting the person behind the avatar or service first and telling him about your dislikes may do wonders too.
  • For Christ and Linden God’s sake, aggregate the full feed of your blog! If only given a partial feed of your blog, I shall not conclude you want me to read what you have to say, I shall conclude you just want me to click your site for adsense revenue or whatever. Of course, I shall stop reading those tiny bits of what you had to say and never visit your site again.
  • Allow anonymous comments: you publish a blog in a way that allows everybody with internet access to read it. (Well, except for some people in China maybe.) So, you should also allow everybody who wants to to comment. You can still moderate comments - or moderate all that include an URL, as I do -, install Askimet and/or Captcha, but at least accept them. One of the most frustrating things is reading a blogpost, liking it/wanting to add something only to find out you can not comment. If you are on Blogger, realise that not all of us want Blogger ID’s. I dislike the platform and thus shall not create an account there. Period. *ponders about open ID*

Also for (SL) Bloggers rules: ‘Also in Second Life, the Golden Rule applies: ‘Do not do to others that which would anger you if others did it to you.’ (Socrates)

Multitasking, my biggest sin.

I’m a heavy multitasker when in Second Life, often switching between the multiple IM conversations in the Second Life client, my feed reader, my browser, Photoshop, … . Often that leads to me totally ignoring main chat and replying to IM’s belated. Bear with me, please! If you notice I do not respond to something in main chat, IM me. If we are IM’ing and you feel offended by my slow replies, tell me so. I will either quit the other things I am doing or will say we can continue the conversastion later.


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  • Friendlist SLetiquette
  • Not-a-meme #17: State Thy Groups
  • No broadband, but do have Tshirts

5 Responses to “Do I have manners? Yes, sir/m’am! (Not-a-meme challenge #18)”

Rose Farina wrote a comment on June 25, 2007
MyAvatars 0.2

I am guilty of the mulitasking sin myself :X

Tinsel Silvera wrote a comment on June 25, 2007
MyAvatars 0.2

Great post Vint! I too live my daily SL life by similar rules of manner. I am the type who IM’s strangers when I see things they have created and tell them how much I like what they have done. One of my pet peeves is when they don’t respond. I don’t do it for a response however it is common courtesy to acknowledge a compliment. I also try to spend time each day helping a newbie learn their way. As for IM’s, you have me at Hello! {:o)

dandellion Kimban wrote a comment on June 25, 2007
MyAvatars 0.2

Not counting shooting the people in RL and othe minor differences between two worlds, my behaviour standards are the same. I think it is because I found that my behaviour in RL is based on stronger principles than “mom told me it should be that way”. Good manners are there for a reason, so I don’t see why should I’d change them in virtual environment.

But, yes, multitasking is a sin I share with you. :)

London Spengler wrote a comment on June 26, 2007
MyAvatars 0.2

I hadn’t thinked about letting annonimous post, but looks like a good idea… (no idea if I am aggregating the full feed of my blog, I’ll have a look).

About everything else… I must be an ugly bitch.

**** Beware, rant ****

I used to have freebie starting packs ready to give away and spended a lot of time orienting newbies… lately I only give them a lot of landmarks, some websites, a pair of suggestions and brush them away.

We used to have a nice plot of land where our neiborhoods could walk and salute… after docens of random porters coming inside of our house we have one of that security systems that kick people away in ten seconds.

Multitasking? My english reading speed is creepy, about half my spanish talking one (I read about two/three times faster in spanish that I talk, and I talk fast! :-p). I feel confused when five or more persons are talking in an open channel, or with more than two IM channels, sigh.

I still answer every IM I get and try to be polite about it (it isn’t as if I have capping problems :-p), but the proportion of “hey, ur cute, wanna fuck” has growed exponentially, even if I am partnered and added a note about my relationship on my main profile tab. I really hope my absolute negative about using voice will help, but probably will only add personal attacks to the mess.

Now I have a shop you can add the “I deleted by mistake my Pandora, can you send me a new one?”; there is always a doubt if they are telling the truth and, even if I don’t mind giving away my product, I don’t like the idea of people thinking I am gullible (mainly because that means more and more IMs of the same kind).

*sighs* I am not as bitter as I sound… I whould be sorry (I already am) about missing the good ones only to avoid the bad ones… but patience grows thin.

Quick and dirty « Pandora’s box sent a pingback on June 29, 2007
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[…] their account should, no, must read this… and if you feeel in the mood read this too, and this and… […]

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